


The Best Possible World

by beetle



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, M/M, Pre - Philosopher's Stone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-22
Updated: 2013-05-22
Packaged: 2017-12-12 16:16:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/813514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beetle/pseuds/beetle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The future is bright and old regrets fall away. Approx. 900 words.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Best Possible World

**Author's Note:**

> Notes/Spoilers/Warnings: Set pre-novels. Vague-ish spoilers for PoA.

Regrets. . . .  
  
Yes, I've had plenty of them, and me not even thirty. Plenty things I wished I hadn't done--or had done, as the case may be. Not the least of which is never telling James just how deep my feelings ran when I was still young enough to believe they'd actually make a difference.  
  
Or here's one that still keeps me up nights, shame running all through me like a fever: luring a sniveling snot of a boy into a werewolf's den as a prank . . . all that could've gone wrong that horrible day, but by Merlin's shining grace didn't.   
  
The weight of Albus' disappointment like a leaden mantle on my shoulders.  
  
The look of genuine hurt in eyes not made for that particular emotion, and the ice-dark contempt that burns out of those eyes that much colder ever since.  
  
Yes, I've regrets a-plenty. But I never realized that it was possible for the deeper ones to turn into something finer--into a whole _person_  I suddenly can't contemplate a life without.   
  
Never thought such a person  _could_  exist, till you. . . .  
  
A throat is cleared and I look up into bright green eyes; the same bright green as yours. Wiser, sadder, but the same. “Yes?”  
  
There's a serene smile twitching Lily's lips and she crosses her arms loosely. “Sirius. I imagine Remus might want to hold him once or twice at some point. And poor James has already forgotten what his son looks like.”  
  
“Have not,” comes from across the room. Ears like a bat, your dad has. “I remember perfectly. He's got my hair, your eyes and mouth . . . a bit of drool about the corners. . . .” James frowns distractedly at the chessboard between himself and Remus.   
  
(I could've told him no amount of frowning and distraction would win him a game. Moony's been rumored to give Albus Dumbledore a run for his galleons, when it comes to chess.)  
  
James reaches for his remaining knight and I roll my eyes. Amateur mistake, that, especially for one who's been playing for so many years. Here's hoping if you get your da's power, you also get your mum's patience and intelligence to balance it, eh?   
  
“Do that, Jamie, and it'll be check in three moves, mate in five.”  
  
My best friends glare at me--James witheringly so--and I shrug. They take the game far too seriously, if you ask me. Anyway,  _you_ are much more interesting than a chessboard. You smile at me--have been smiling all afternoon, hang all of James' twaddle about babies and gas.  
  
Lily settles next to me on the couch, her hair glowing almost Weasley-red in the westering sunlight, looking barely old enough to have taken her OWLs, let alone be a mother.   
  
“James and I have been talking and--well.” She leans closers, lowering her voice. “Inviting the two of you here was more than a social gesture. We would like for you and Remus to be his godparents.”  
  
Surprised, and pleasantly so, I grin at her and at you, the warm, innocent bundle of life and potential who's yawning in my arms. I don't think I've ever wanted to protect anyone more, have ever loved instantaneously or this deeply. “Have you asked Moony, yet?” I murmur, glancing in his direction.   
  
Somber old boy is your Uncle Remus. Been that way for as long as I've known him. For his whole life, one assumes. But if anything could bring a bit of grin to that earnest, too-serious face--aside from trouncing the unwary at chess--it's you. He isn't nearly as happy as he deserves to be, never has been. . . .  
  
You're going to love him, though. Everyone does.  
  
When I return my gaze to Lily, she's watching me with a gentle, knowing smile on her face. I find myself flushing and clearing my throat for no reason at all. “Well, have you asked him?”  
  
“James was supposed to ask him over a . . .  _friendly_  game of chess.” Lily glances over at her husband, her smile gone fond and a bit silly. “He does seem to have gotten side-tracked--”  
  
“Oh, bloody hell,” James moans at the same time Remus declares, “Mate,” and sits back in his chair. That aforementioned rare grin beams out briefly, and when he turns it on me, it's all I can do to remember to breathe for a moment.  
  
“Alright--new game. You go first, this time,” James grits out, scowling thunderously. Remus merely nods and starts replacing the taken pieces--most of which were James'.  
  
“Moony'll make an excellent godfather, Lily . . . but shouldn't the other godparent, traditionally speaking, be female? And anyway I'm--”  _I'm hardly anyone's idea of a role model_ , is what I mean to say, but Lily's smile has faded.   
  
Your Uncle Remus and I are two of only a handful of friends that haven't abandoned your parents since--  
  
I've a tendency to put my foot well in it, you should know.  
  
“I'm honored,” I finish softly, holding you closer. “One can never have too many godfathers, these days. I'll do my best to--to be there for him, no matter what.”  
  
My absolute best.  
  
Lily's smile comes back full force and I understand, not for the first time nor the last, why James fell in love with her.  
  
Looking down at you in my arms, the symbol of that love fallen sound asleep--no one's ever fallen asleep in  _my_  arms before, never trusted me half so much--I couldn't love you more if you were my own, Harry.   
  
Any world where I get to be one of the many people who will look after you and guide you, is the best possible world, to my way of thinking. And when I imagine how good your life will be once this initial unpleasantness is over--how filled with light and love. . . .  
  
I realize my old regrets have fallen away.


End file.
